


Snowball War

by blueboxesandtrafficcones



Series: 31 Days of Ficmas 2018 [1]
Category: Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: F/F, F/M, Gen, Snowball Fight, Team TARDIS
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-02
Updated: 2018-12-02
Packaged: 2019-09-05 08:53:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,253
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16807435
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/blueboxesandtrafficcones/pseuds/blueboxesandtrafficcones
Summary: Rose and the Doctor disagree about 13's level of responsibility when it came to the Death Eye Turtle Army.  Deciding to settle it like adults, they split Team TARDIS down the middle - and wage the snowball war for the ages.





	Snowball War

**Author's Note:**

> Welcome to Day 1 of 31 Days of Ficmas! For any not familiar with the challenge, it is 31 days of holiday seasonal words as prompts, one for each day of December. Each will be its own separate story, collected together in a Series.
> 
> Day 1 - snowball fight.
> 
> Thanks for reading!

Three weeks onboard the TARDIS had done little to diminish Yaz’s wonder for her new surroundings. While Ryan preferred to spend his free time in the Entertainment Room playing 23rd century video games and Graham took advantage of the library, she opted to wander the halls, learning the layout of the spaceship. Two years of training as a police officer had drilled into her the importance of knowing her whereabouts in relation to where she needed to be.

Of course, her explorations had limited value; every morning a different path led to the galley, and a single path never took her to the same place twice. _The TARDIS is alive, Yaz_ , the Doctor had said, and that was never more evident than in the changing floorplans.

She loved it.

Surprisingly for someone who liked to have control, it didn’t bother her that she was habitually lost. The few times she’d grown worried enough to call for help, within two minutes she’d either walked through a doorway into the console room or the Doctor had appeared, leading her back to where she’d been trying to go, babbling a hundred miles an hour the whole way. That only made her more confident in her investigations.

So far she’d found two pools, four squash courts, a garden, an art gallery, and several disused bedrooms. Today, she was on the hunt for a fitness center or exercise room. The Sheffield Constabulary had certain expectations of its officers, and running with the Doctor proved that endurance was key. She was doing well so far, able to keep up, but without a training regimen she was worried that might change.

Ryan had scoffed, dismissing her concerns, but a few days before she had stumbled across him in a mostly empty room practicing climbing a ladder, padded cushions on the ground in case he fell. She’d quietly backed out, letting him have his privacy, all the while fiercely proud of her friend.

Feminine voices ahead alerted Yaz that she was about to get sidetracked, but she wasn’t too bothered as the hallway spilled into the console room. Leaning against the doorway with her arms folded, she smirked as she watched the Doctor and her wife argue.

Despite heated tones and hands perched on hips, their stance and closeness suggested flirting more than anything, and it never failed to make Yaz smile. Her new friend carried the universe on her shoulders – and as strong as she was, she still needed someone to help lighten the load, and the other woman appeared to do so with ease.

“-which is why I’m absolutely right, and Yaz agrees. Don’t you Yaz?” The Doctor’s raised pitch invited her in, and letting her arms fall to her sides, she stepped further into the room.

“What trouble are you causing now?”

The Doctor’s indignant splutter was drowned out by her wife’s laughter.

“Oh, she’s got your number, love,” Rose sniggered, leaning back against the console. “And it only took three weeks. That might be record. Well done, Yaz.”

“Thanks,” she grinned at the slightly more petite blonde. The couple looked very similar, standing at nearly the same height with matching bottle-blonde hair and mischievous grins. The only way she could tell them apart the first few trips was the Doctor’s tigger-like energy and manner compared to Rose’s steady, laidback attitude, and their outfits – the Doctor only ever seemed to change her shirt whereas Rose was always in a new, cute outfit that made Yaz jealous of her closet and apparent budget.

“You didn’t answer my question, though,” Yaz prompted, raising her eyes at the now-pouting Time Lord.

“I’m not causing trouble,” the alien denied hotly. “I was just saying that the Death Eye Turtle Army was _not_ my fault.”

“Ehhh…” Yaz grimaced, considering, before shrugging one shoulder. “To be fair, it wasn’t _not_ your fault either.”

“Traitor!” the Doctor gasped, before turning a glare on Rose who was bent in half, howling with laughter as she clung to the console for support. “And you, Rose Tyler!”

“What?” she gasped, holding her sides.

“You- you- you impugn my honor!”

“Oh, I’m really glad you didn’t say belittle,” her wife sniggered, before bursting into giggles again.

Yaz’s nose wrinkled, slightly lost. The couple clearly had a rich history, if their frequent incoherent asides were any indication.

“Inside joke,” Rose explained briefly, confirming the theory. “If you ever meet a Sontaran, it’ll make perfect sense. Long story.”

“Well, we all came out of it safe and sound, so no harm no foul,” Yaz offered, giving the Doctor a tentative smile.

“Thank you, Yaz. Nice to see _someone_ appreciates me.”

Rose rolled her eyes, grinning at Yaz as she directed at her wife, “I appreciate you more when you when you get us out of trouble than when you get us _into_ it. And even moreso when we can have a nice day out without any trouble at all.”

“You love it.”

“Yeah, and I love chocolate cake, doesn’t mean I need to experience it every single day.”

Yaz coughed deliberately, trying to derail another bickering session at least long enough to get out of the room; it tended to get a bit too close to the line between flirty and foreplay for her to feel comfortable observing. Never mind that Rose was staring at the Doctor like _she_ was chocolate cake. “Are we going anywhere today?”

“Yes,” the Doctor said decisively, moving towards the controls as if struck with inspiration and starting to throw switches and press buttons in a possibly-meaningful order. “We’re going to settle this disagreement like adults.”

Rose sighed deeply, the knowing exhale of a fondly exasperated spouse. Yaz heard it often when her father started on his conspiracy theories. “Somehow I doubt your idea of what qualifies as ‘adult’ is vastly different from mine.” Turning, she began manipulating the controls in front of her with a familiarity Yaz found fascinating. Nothing was labeled yet she never hesitated in her movements, graceful and efficient. Even the Doctor sometimes struggled with apparently new systems, and if she didn’t know better she’d think Rose was the original operator of the craft. Though the Doctor’s occasional jealous look was usually humorous.

“Rose! Not that kind of adult!”

“I didn’t- that wasn’t- shut up,” Rose groaned, stretching to flick a switch almost out of reach before swatting at her spouse. “I _meant_ something along the lines of just letting it go, being the bigger person. Accepting responsibility.”

“Ah.” The Doctor’s nose crinkled, and she shook her head. “Nope, no thanks, not me.”

“Where are we going?” Yaz cut in, grabbing onto a holdbar as they careened through the Vortex, watching with awe as the couple flew around the console, giving happy laughs at every bit of turbulence.

“There’s this planet called Woman Wept,” the Doctor started, only for Rose to immediately cut in.

“-An’ it’s absolutely _gorgeous_. Once upon a time it was pretty much all water, only the sun died suddenly and everything flash-froze. ‘S called that because when you look at it from above, it looks like a woman crying. Now it’s all snow and ice.”

“And what does that have to do with settling your disagreement like adults?”

“Snowball fight,” the Doctor said brightly, as though it were perfectly reasonable and obvious.

Yaz just shook her head, capitalizing on her last few moments with the women as she could hear Ryan and Graham stumbling down the hall. “You’re gonna settle it with a snowball fight?” For just a moment, she remembered the last call she’d taken before stumbling across Ryan in the forest – two grown women needing supervision to resolve a parking dispute. These two were far more entertaining.

The boys burst in then, Ryan in front with Graham hot on his heels.

“Wha’s goin’ on?” They moved to their stations, taking hold for dear life just as they hit a nasty bit of turbulence.

“Snowball fight on an alien planet. You up for it?” The Doctor’s indefatigable adventuring spirit made them all grin, and Ryan was the first to agree.

“Hell yeah.”

“Why not?” Graham added, as the ship landed with a final shudder.

“Brilliant!” The Doctor leapt towards the door, throwing them open and revealing a tantalizing glimpse of white.

The companions made to follow, only turning back when Rose cleared her throat.

“It’s freezing out there. There’s hats, gloves, scarves, and coats in this closet,” she said, throwing open a door in the wall to reveal a multitude of wintery items in all shapes sizes and colors, selecting an absurdly long, multi-colored scarf for herself.

“Really? You’ll trip and die on that thing,” Yaz muttered as she pawed through the items to find a matching set.

Rose winked, still winding it around her neck. “Not before the Doctor dies of hearts failure.”

Suitably kitted out, the four humans (though Yaz still wasn’t fully convinced about Rose) stepped out to find a dozen snowmen of various sizes and incredible detail in the snow around the ship. Each had a different face and body type, or as much as a snowman could have, but they must have meant something to Rose because she giggled and went up to the fourth one from the ship and gave it her scarf.

“Wicked,” Ryan breathed, making Yaz look up – and gasp.

“Oh my…”

A sixty-foot frozen wave towered over them, glistening in the moonlight. Rose was right; it was spectacular. Similar shapes rose out of the darkness in the distance, giving the place an eerie but serene feel.

“Does anyone live here?” Graham asked, looking around, his face showing the same marvel as Ryan’s and her own.

“Not anymore. Planet died when the sun did,” the Doctor reported sadly, dropping the snowball she held, her wife wrapping a comforting arm around her shoulders.

“So, how are we splitting up the teams?” Ryan stepped closer to the Doctor, staring at the wave overhead in awe.

“Boys against girls?” Rose suggested, making Ryan and Graham frown at her.

“What, the two of us against the three of you? Nah, man, that’s not fair!” Ryan protested, crossing his arms.

“What? No, the two of you with me,” the Doctor said cheerfully, kissing Rose quickly before moving away. “Then Rose and Yaz.”

Graham didn’t seem assuaged, raising an eyebrow. “Maybe I should sit out, keep score, that sort of thing. Make it even.”

“What? No!” The Doctor’s face fell as she wrapped her arm around his shoulders. “We’ve only barely got a chance the three of us.”

“And it’s not just two,” Rose smirked, disappearing through the TARDIS door only to return a moment later with Grace, who was grinning widely. “The TARDIS is a cheater, taking pity on the Doctor and not letting Grace know we’d landed.”

“Oh, you’re going _down_ ,” Ryan’s nan gloated, poking her husband in the chest. “You haven’t a prayer, love.”

“That’s not fair,” the Doctor whined, glaring at her wife. “You three’ll be too good.”

“All’s fair in love and war,” Rose retorted, “and this most certainly is war.”

“My dignity’s at stake!”

“What dignity?”

“Children, children,” Grace soothed, laughing, “three on three seems like a fair fight.”

“I heartily disagree-” the Doctor started, only to splutter at a sudden mouthful of snow as Rose shrieked with laughter and took off across the frozen tundra. “Saboteur! Come back here!”

The Doctor began chasing Rose as Grace, unseen by Graham, carefully packed a solid snowball, and with a wink to Yaz, lobbed it at her husband.

“Oi!” he yelped, before scooping up a ball as well and throwing at Yaz.

“Hey!”

And the war was on.

* * *

Twenty minutes later it had devolved into each of the married couples chasing their spouses around, fighting bitterly and taking no prisoners. Every so often someone would yelp or scream as snow was shoved unceremoniously down their shirtback, and Yaz and Ryan watched it all with a laugh.

“It’s nice to see them so happy,” Yaz commented, sipping at the hot chocolate the ship had provided. She and Ryan had easily declared a truce after the third snowball in a row she’d nailed him with, and they’d brought out a bench and pile of blankets to watch the ‘adults’ ~~battle for supremacy~~ play.

“Yeah. I think Nan loves this travelin’ more than the rest of us combined.”

“Definitely.” They shared a laugh, though Yaz’s smile slipped at the reminder of how closely they’d come to not having Grace with them. If Rose hadn’t been there to cushion her fall… Sure, both women hobbled away with bruised ribs and aching bodies, but they’d walked away.

“Hey, stop that,” Ryan chided, elbowing her in the side. “She’s fine, ‘s all good. What’s that Rose keeps saying, ‘Don’t borrow trouble’?”

Yaz nodded, forcing the thought from her mind as she nudged him back. “I think the TARDIS gave us a snowball gun – want to take them all down?”

“But the Doctor doesn’t like guns.” He gave her a wide-eyed, innocent look before he started laughing, throwing his head back and letting it ring out. “Hell. Yes. You pack, I’ll shoot.”

It didn’t take long to build a well-stocked cache, deciding that Ryan would aim and Yaz would load – part of the gun seemed to be an old automatic tennis ball launcher; all she had to do was feed the snowballs through as fast as she could, and Ryan would do the rest.

Within five minutes they were forevermore known as the undisputed Snowball Fight Champions.


End file.
